Okay.

There's always some reason to feel not good enough. Sure, but that isn't how we are supposed to live. It's so easy to fall victim to someone who will give you a certain type of attention, but not respect you in the ways that truly matter. In the moment the affection is great and there is no reason to doubt that it isn't sincere, but if that person isn't willing to see you as a priority, then No, leave that shit. You're better than that.. It could be so easy to be weak, I know, but who wants to start a trend in relationships, like that? Don't be the weaker half. That doesn't necessarily mean that you always have to be this powerhouse, that you must always have the upper hand and be a complete jerk, or that you must learn to attract those that are weaker than you...it just means that you don't fucking settle for anything less than what you deserve. Have some respect for yourself and stand by your word. If you say you're not going to talk to someone who is mistreating you, follow through. This message is to me and to anyone who finds it fitting.




In other news, baseball is back! I can't tell you how happy that makes me. I plan on watching every Giants game this season. I am purchasing mlb.tv by the month. It's well worth the $15 because let me tell you, I just need baseball in my life. Another thing, I plan on marrying Noah Lowry next May. He's pitching tomorrow and although he's had a few rough starts during ST, I believe in him. A good girlfriend's gotta, you know?

Okay, so I know that I've sounded really pathetic recently ("I hate most people," "I'm fucking sick of people," "I hate my life," etc.), but I have my reasons. You see, my expectations are just too high for all the wrong people. I am tired of obligations. I do not approve of the return of cold weather. This and I am desperately homesick. But so is everyone else, right? so I just have to be tough about it, because no one is going to pity me for longer than a day.




In the end, at the end of an entry or at the end of a series of thoughts, I always find that - no matter what - I am blessed.